Is Valentine’s Day haram?
Many people consider Valentine’s Day to be haram. This is generally based on emotion. As Valentine’s Day is part of Western Culture and Islamically we do not have a day when people express love, it is assumed that this must be haram.
However in order to call something haram you need evidence. You cannot label something haram based on emotions. To give something a haram label is serious matter. It means that the one who does that is sinful and punishable.
One might argue that Valentine’s Day is haram on the basis that Ibn ’Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) said:
He who imitates any people is considered to be one of them. (Abu Dawud and Ibn Hibban)
On this basis, one could say wearing a suit and tie is haram because it is imitating disbelievers, and not the dress of Muslims. That conclusion would be wrong, because wearing a suit or tie is not related to belief. As long a dress fulfils the criteria of Shariah it is considered permissible. The hadith does not apply to everything. It only applies to matters related to ibadah. For instance, wearing a cassock or a cross would be haram, because that is imitating a priest or a Christian. Those items are related to belief.
Valentine’s Day is not related to worship
Celebrating or not celebrating Valentine’s Day is not related to belief or worship. It is permissible or not depending on who is expressing their love to whom. For instance, there would be nothing wrong with a husband expressing love to his wife by buying her flowers or a gift or taking her out for a meal etc. Nor would there be anything wrong in children expressing love for their mother or siblings.
Islam advocates expressing love
It is part of Islam to express love between spouses, within families and between friends. The Prophet (peace be on him) expressed his love for his wives, his children and for his companions to them, and encouraged them to do the same.
Anas ibn Malik (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that a man was with the Prophet (peace be on him) when another man passed by and he said:
‘O Messenger of Allah, I love this man.’
The Prophet (peace be on him) said to him: ‘Have you told him?’
He said: ‘No.’
He said: ‘Tell him.’
So he caught up with him and said: ‘I love you for the sake of Allah!’ He said: ‘May the one for Whose sake you love me also love you!’
I understand the fact that we need to preserve our deen and not inject anything into it that changes or compromises the principles. However, if we ignored the name Valentine’s Day, and on this day a man gave flowers to his wife would this be haram? There is nothing haram about this.
There is no act of disbelief in showing your love. In fact, showing your love is part of your imaan.
It would be haram if someone bought flowers for a girlfriend or boyfriend. Therefore it is not giving the gift which is haram, but the relationship between the parties which makes it halal or haram.
It is similar to asking is television halal or haram? The TV itself is not haram. What is halal or haram is what you are watching. If you are watching documentaries, or the news or useful programmes, then it is halal. But if you are watching programmes which have haram content, then of course that is haaram.
It is similar to when people say celebrating birthdays or celebrating Mother’s Day is haram. What is haram about celebrating birthdays? People are just coming together and celebrating a new year for their son or daughter or themselves. They have some food and sweets, there is nothing haram about this. Similarly visiting your mother, showing your love and appreciation for what she has done for you, and giving her a gift can hardly be called haram.
Shaykh Haytham Tamim
Transcribed by Asma Hussain
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