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Islam and navigating puberty in girls (part 1)

Islam and navigating puberty in girls (part 1)

What is puberty?

How does it affect girls’ physical, emotional and psychological development?  

What advice does Allah and the Prophet (peace be upon him) give us to help us get through this period successfully?

We look at puberty and give tips from experts to help you get through this time.

Puberty and physical Changes

Puberty is a time of changes. It is a natural and most crucial part of human development. This is the time when the body is preparing to develop into an adult. How we approach this topic with girls is key as it will affect their identity as young women (how they view themselves as a female), their self-esteem and confidence in the real world, and how they view their sexuality, ie their sexual body parts.

As parents and mums, we need to continue to take interest and care in our daughters’ growth and development and be especially self-aware of any cultural shaming around weight loss and body parts that we have inherited from our older generation, from preconceived notions from Islam and any negative language or barriers.

We will look at this topic from a wholistic point of view starting the first session with the

Physical changes

  • Recap from PSHCE and biology lessons:
    • What is puberty
    • Physical changes associated with puberty
  • Scientific tips and Advices from the Quran and Sunnah on to look after our bodies as we grow?

Recap from PSHCE and biology lessons

Puberty is a time when girls and boys grow up into adulthood.

For girls, on average puberty starts from the age of 8 until they are 13. 

During puberty, a flurry of hormones cause physical changes in your body and cause your sexual organs to mature. You are aware of some of these changes. They include:

Physical changes associated with puberty

Growth Spurt: This is probably the most obvious change you will notice. Girls normally have a growth spurt between the age of 10 to 14 and boys have it between ages 14 and 17.

Body shape: Boys tend to become broader around the shoulder and build more muscle while girls become wider around the hips and that is all normal.

Breast changes your breasts begin to grow bigger.

Hair around your body such as facial hair on your upper lips, thicker eyebrows, hair under your armpits and pubic hair. Initially the hair is light and sparse and as puberty goes on it begins to get thicker.

Body odour You will notice your sweat has a certain odor specially if you are atheletic. Some boys and girls will develop earlier and tend to sweat more and have a stronger body odor than others and that’s perfectly normal. We are different and we need to recognize that we are all unique.

Vaginal discharge Just like our body sweats so does our private parts. Women have a vagina which is the female sexual organ. During puberty, you will notice that the vagina also sweats and it releases a white sticky slimy fluid which is also normal.

Periods/menstrual cycle Puberty is a stage where the body gets ready for reproduction.  Most of you have probably started on your period. This is an important and natural part of our sexual development.

A period is when every month the lining of the uterus sheds which is why we have a cycle and we get bleeding through the vagina. Most of us call it a period.

How can we look after our bodies during puberty?

Positive image of our bodies

  • Allah has made you beautiful. We are the best creation of Allah and everything we have is a gift from Him. Our mind, our hearts, our emotions and our bodies.
  • Every single part of our body is growing according to how Allah designed it.
  • Let’s thank Allah for you and your beautiful growing body.
  • Whether it is our hips getting wider, our breasts getting bigger, the tissue around our vagina getting thicker, or pubic hair on the mound of our vagina, all of that and more is how Allah has made it for us to become a woman. And we thank Allah for all of this and more.
  • Never. We should never think of our private parts as dirty or shameful because Allah created them and they are a part of us.
  • Be careful of the influence from the fashion industry. One of the common pressures that girls experience around this time, is from friends, social media tik tok videos and a selfi culture to look a certain way and to wear what everybody else is wearing.

The fashion industry spends millions of dollars every year especially on advertising on all the upcoming brands to lure teenagers to buy their products because they know they can easily make money from what you buy. If you look at billboards, tv adverts, netflixes, social media, girls tend to look slim, slender almost like a size 0 model. All of that is advertising is false to get you to look the same and buy their crop tops, air forcers, skinny’s and whatever else they sell. So we need to be careful not to get caught up in that.

Eat Healthy (Recap from PSHCE and Biology)

  • This is a time when your bones are growing, and you’re gaining height and strength. Every part of your body needs food to grow.
  • Eat nutritionally healthy foods such as dairy, cheese, yogurts, all types of fruits. Berries and green vegetables like broccoli, spinach, asparagus are excellent for building your immune system and will protect you from getting sick.   
  • Your taste buds are also changing. Try a new vegetable that you haven’t tried before try.
  • Increase your intake of dairy which contain high amount of calcium which your bones need to grow.
  • Cut down on sugary and processed foods. Try and have them as a treat rather than on a daily basis.
  • Avoid diets

Diets

You have to recognise that it is natural for girls and boys to be more self-conscious during this time and you might feel vulnerable about how you look. Be aware of comments and pressure from friends and especially family members like aunties and grandmothers, where they may talk comment on how we look or what you eat. Be aware that aunties and grandmothers also come from a culture where the norms and values were different. This may make you feel more conscious and put pressure on girls to lose weight.

Please know this is incorrect and wrong. Your body needs lots of nutrition and food to grow. Girls can experience eating disorders such as anorexia where they stop eating or eat very little or avoid meals or bulimia where they eat a lot and then they will go to a toilet and purge or gag themselves to vomit. This makes them losing a large amount of weight where they become sick and develop other illnesses and may even become hospitalized and it can also lead to long term disease.

Please be aware that this does happen and we should always check ourselves and tell our parents if this is the case.

Cleanliness

  • Take care of your hygiene: Shower every day, change your underpants every day.
  • Wash your private parts with water after you use the toilets. 
  • During your cycle, be extra careful to change your pads regularly. When you dispose off your pads after use, make sure you fold it and wrap it before you put it in the bin.
  • Taking a ghusl after your cycle is over and resume your Salah straight away.
  • Remove the pubic hair once a month.
  • Use a deodorant that works and use it regularly. Sometimes you may not be able to smell yourself but other people can smell you.
  • Be mindful of any bad breath especially after meals. Make sure that you are flossing and brushing your teeth in the morning and before you go to bed.
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Sabeen completed her studies in the United States graduating with a Bachelor’s in Psychology and a Master’s in Public Health. She worked in project management in UNICEF and in education at The Cancer Institute of New Jersey. With a passion in Islamic history, and Quranic Arabic, always yearning to seek the truth, she started her Islamic journey professionally with Nurul Ilm Academy in Dubai in 2007, studying the Darse-Nizami curriculum and qualified as an Alimah. In 2014, she expanded her knowledge of Islam by participating in retreats and taking short courses at Utrujj with Shaykh Haytham Tamim. She continues to learn from Shaykh Haytham. She also studied Tafseer and Aqeedah at the Cambridge Islamic College under Shaykh Akram Nadwi. She continues her Arabic journey at Arabica Institute. Sabeen has been actively running Islamic circles for teenage girls to discuss contemporary issues and the Islamic narrative. She lives in London with her family and four children.