Turn differences to strengths The Prophet Muhammad (peace be on him) said: ‘Treat women kindly. Woman has been created from a rib and the most bent part of the rib is the uppermost. If you try to turn it straight, you will break it. And if you leave it alone, it will remain bent as it is. So treat women kindly.’ (Bukhari and Muslim) A woefully misunderstood hadith A hadith which urges men to show kindness to their wives has been quoted through the ages as an example of women’s oppression. The hadith of Adam’s rib has been understood by many to suggest that women – like the curved rib – are crooked and inferior to men. The words of hadith is a call to accept the inherent differences between men and women, turn them to strengths and to bridge the gaps between their respective emotions and perspectives with kindness. The hadith is specifically aimed at men, as it is typically men who wield power in the marital relationship. This does not mean that there are no marriages where women dominate, or that women are inferior intellectually or spiritually, but a reflection of the fact that in the majority of marriages (and Islamically) men have the financial responsibility of taking care of their wives and children. Men are not to be dictators Does this mean a man can become a dictator within the marriage or home? Absolutley not. Here are the evidences that show that marriage is meant to be a place of harmony and kindness, which are its fundamental principles. In Surah Araf, Allah Almighty says: It is God Who created you from a single soul and out of it made its spouse to bring it comfort. (7:189) Moreover, men and women have the same rights and responsibilities, and both are … Continue reading Adam’s Rib – Resolving conflicts with kindness